Women. God I hate em.

by fiona

2010-01-10 12:51:10 PDT

Obliquely referencing your bra colour on Facebook is the dumbest fad ever, but if you say so, women are all, "You hater! This is for breast cancer awareness!" as if saying something is dumb means you're pro-cancer. Look here special-bitch, who likes cancer? But how a narcissistic campaign that purposely leaves men out of the loop most effectively promotes "awareness" of anything other than the fact that we all spent time in Grade 6 escapes me.

I have noticed, too, that a lot of the women posting "ivory" and "blush pink" (oh shut up you delicate flower) are also the mega-annoying ones who set their profile picture as their distended pregnant belly or an ultrasound image, which, yeah. I think my own developing kid looks like Alien, and I have hormones to condition me to not think that and I still think that, because that's what ultrasounds look like, so I think that theirs look even more like Alien, and also: no one cares. Point is though that if you are knocked up or have had a baby and are throwing around a medical image of your own guts, why be coy about your damn underwear? As I have discovered to my horror, lots of women see nothing socially wrong with regaling people with their own or their cousin/mother/friend/coworker's detailed birth stories (a fetish that manages to be somehow both horrifying and twee-- as if David Cronenberg started writing a mommy blog) and I mean: women will blithely lob gross/banal minutiae about their goddamn vaginas at you like a conversational grenade, and then they get all Tee hee! Bras are secret!

...really?

Is this game supposed to actually accomplish anything? Women are all, Wow! A social phenomenon! It's the power for change Obama windfarm energy! Or, you know, it's a cutesy fad. How many women who posted, "None... ;)" the other day actually went to get a mammogram? Yeah, thank God for the brave women pioneers of Facebook: we woke up today in a world without breast cancer.

For fucksake.

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